Unprepared

As I tire from rolling backwards in my chair to reach the huge bowl of complimentary coconut flavored M&Ms placed strategically on the table behind me, and not knowing what to do with all of my nervous energy, I blog.  The semester hasn't started yet here at GCSU so I am savoring my last bit of down time until next summer.  This summer, we prepared for my P-Nuts new adventure that started this morning- she is now a GMC cadet!  No matter how much I prepared her physically, I realized this morning that I never prepared myself emotionally.  My daughter must have a great poker face, nerves of steel, or she is really good at holding things in.  If she is either of these...she did not get it from her mom!  She kept telling me "I'm not nervous, I've had several first days".  On the verge of tears and puke, I responded"Oh...ok?!?".  Her dad had strict orders for me to take lots of pictures and I was "prepared" to do so.  After dropping her off at her locker and kids that looked identical hurrying about...she got lost in the crowd.  Three pics max...sorry babe!  All while Britton is tugging on me and saying "can we go yet?, I'm ready to go to my school!"

 Things are very different this year...I keep fighting the urge to check in with her...oh wait- I can't anymore!  I can no longer....text her teacher and check in on her.  She can no longer...borrow her teachers phone to chat a bit.  Yikes- I know for some of you reading this may sound strange, but that's just how blessed we have been!  She is growing up way too fast for me and not fast enough for herself!  I remember those days all too well.  Praying for all the cadets today!  Go Dogs!!

P.S  4pm can't come fast enough!

 

P-Nut and mystery Craft twin:)

Baby girl!

SCA friends!

Disappointment

Have you ever been disappointed? Of course you have!...and so have I!  In James he reminds us that the source of quarrels is our selfish desires and not getting what we want.  I am guilty of being a people pleaser and tend to try to keep people happy.  Good or bad?  Good in the sense that it helps me feel I am doing good for others.  "Acts of service" tends to be my love language and the two  may be related.  Bad- when I realize that no matter how much or how kind I am to some people...it still isn't enough.   People will still find fault.  The take home message in all of this is ... everything I do should be done for the glory of God...not myself, nor to make someone happy.  Sometimes people don't realize your heart nor its intentions and will still  be angry at your attempts.  I somehow keep forgetting this important piece of the puzzle that should have been ingrained in me from an early age in public service.  No one hardly ever had a simple order in the food industry I grew up in.

 "Could I have a Quarter Pounder with mayo..oh, only on one side of the bread please...ketchup, mustard, and pickle. Oh and some fries...extra crispy.  Also, could you put that in a bag instead of the usual Styrofoam box because the condensation from the warm food causes my burger to be soggy."

 What I wanted to say..." Do you think you really can tell what and how many sides the mayo is slathered on when you chew this?   I can serve you a cold burger if you would like to prevent the soggy bread. Sure, I will make sure your fries are burnt." 

What I really said "Sure...give us about 15 minutes and we will have it right out (thanks mom)!

The moral of the story...

Don't be a people pleaser...it wears you out!

Don't let preferences rule you...ease up and go with the flow!

Put others desires before your own...not easy to do but so rewarding!

I need to practice what I preach:)




 

 

Call Me Old Fashion

This has been a long time coming.  I have made several attempts and failed...every time.  This time- I am done! 

Technology has made many advances and claims to have made every one's life much easier...right?  I beg to differ.  Somethings may be easier- but overall, in my humble opinion, with the world at my fingertips... at all times....

it sucked me in

I became enslaved

I spent more time reading Facebook than I did reading God's word

I spent more time on my phone than with my husband

I spent more time on my phone than with my children

It was the first thing I grabbed upon awakening to see what may have happened in the few hours I slept

It was what I turned to while stopped at a red light as opposed to turning to my children and asking them about their day


I don't think it is coincidence...

 that a few days ago my "little" dropped my iPhone in a cup of coke

 that the deductible for a replacement phone through Verizon was something we couldn't afford

 that I found a new, basic, "dumbphone" for a very affordable cost on amazon.com

that our cellphone bill will be $30.00 less a month and $360.00 less a year

I don't even believe in coincidences!

I believe in a Sovereign God who loves me and gently teaches, leads, and guides me!

I am neither tooting my own horn nor trying to judge people who may be doing these same things.  I simply am sharing with you my recent conviction.  No phone or piece of technology is more valuable than time spent with our heavenly Father or our loved ones. I challenge you to enjoy life with you head held high not downcast and by the glow of your phone.  I am reminded of a scripture and this I will leave with you..

Matthew 5:30

 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

'til later,
Leah

Losing Control

Ever just accepted something about yourself and just settled for it thinking ..."that's just the way I am and I can't help it?" Being the youngest of four, I have always felt I had to prove my point, be heard, strive hard to be the best or just better anyway, etc...  It also could have something to do with me being very strong willed. Hmmm?   Alright already! Enough excuses!   Recently I discovered something about myself, a character trait, if you will.    Over the past few weeks I have often thought I was looking into a mirror while watching others lose control, pitch fits, sling things, slam things down, walk very hard and with entirely too much purpose.   I've listened to people and sworn it was me carrying on a conversation with myself as I listened to them speak loud and rude.  

When a revelation occurs that you are lacking in something that is very vital in your Christian walk, it is a very humbling experience.  I have intentionally ,over the last week or so, tried to keep my thoughts to myself and remember that not everyone has to hear my opinion every time.   I am like a water balloon about to explode when I feel the need to pry into a conversation with my two cents worth. 

God has placed me in several circumstances recently that allowed me to see just what I look and sound like sometimes.  Clearly I heard Him say-  Be still, Be quiet!  It matters not what you think on this matter. I am God and you are not.  It matters not what they think your opinion is.  It only matters what My opinion of you is and where your heart is- how you respond!  Wow! As the 2x4 split me wide open- it was a bittersweet moment. 

One afternoon, as my baller was at batting practice, I sat on the grassy lawn with my spread...God, my Bible, pen, paper, a wide open space, and lots of prayer.  I couldn't let this go, so I decided to study up on the matter.    I was brought to

Galatians  5:22-23. 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness and self-control.   

Did you catch the last fruit?  SELF CONTROL.  If the Spirit is in me, I bear His fruit!  I have work to do.  When I became a child of God, I took on His Spirit and it dwells in me.  I think the self control was pushed aside by me, ignored. It never was a character trait yet a Spiritual deficit. Losing control hurts others as well as your Christian walk! 

God help me tame my tongue and may my words and the meditations of my heart be pleasing unto You!

One More Day

Ever had an emotional breakdown?  Of course you have.  If you have lost a parent, you know that these things happen and it doesn't take much for the dam to break.  After dropping my kiddos off at school, I was listening to my favorite Christian radio station and in honor of Mother's Day, they were having listeners call in and share a special memory of their mom.   My mind began to dream of the possibility of having one more day with my mom.

If I had one more day with my mom I would walk the path from my yard to hers (as I did everyday while she was here) and tell her....

Thank you for loving me when I was so hard to love!

Thank you for showing me Christ's love and how to love and serve others!

Thank you for teaching me good work ethics and not to expect everything be handed to me and to work hard!

It's hard to sit back and watch my kids heart break.  Did you cry when I cried?

Marriage is the hardest thing I have ever done but the best thing that has ever happened to me...and
You would be proud of the boy you thought was so goofy- he has grown into a mighty man of God-(but still goofy).

Mama, you spoiled Daddy! I am not responsible for any decisions he makes.  I looked around at a visitation for a friends mom who passed away and he had on a white shirt, (you know his favorite ones with the front left pocket and the elastic waist), and there were food stains/droppings down the front.  Sorry! 

Let me take you to visit all of your grandchildren , they are so beautiful and full of life!


This is a cruel world we live in - I am so glad you don't have to witness it!

Until we meet again...Happy Mother's Day!  I Love You!






 

Meet Joe

Every day the Lord allows me to awake with breath in my lungs is a good day.  Today was no exception.  My alarm sounded at 415, I sloooooowly arise and don the running gear.  I can't resist the face of the white ball of fluff lying in her crate as I enter the living room.  So I take her on her morning outing in the front yard and all of a sudden I realize it is sprinkling rain.  Sprinkles haven't stopped our running in the past, but in a few short minutes it converted to a full, heavy rain.  My mind wonders...run or go back to bed?  My answer came in the form of a text from my Love..."its raining...go back to bed".  So off to bed I go, I take my Bible and my current study by Kelly Minter "No Other Gods" to bed.  I complete day 5 then nuzzle. To nuzzle, according to Webster, is to lie close or snug...this calls for some great sleep until....the alarm sounds for the second time.  I thank God for my extra sleep and the best nuzzle partner ever.  I begin my usual routine.  My 6 foot, blue-eyed, coffee fairy came and left me a fresh, hot cup of coffee for me to enjoy after my shower. 

 

 After finally heading out with the kids, we are on the road to Milledgeville and we spot Joe Henry waiting for someone to give him a ride. With not much time to spare, I look over at Jordan and realize...we have to stop...conviction- you gotta love it!  For those of you who aren't from Wilkinson County, you may not know Joe.  I have known him since I was a small child.  One of my earliest memories is of him giving me a quarter here and there and my parents taking him to and fro to various places-all of course while I was a little squirmish because he can be a little frightening to a child.  When I was a teenager, he gave me a pair of his Liberty overalls that were too small for him.  Of course I washed and washed again, cut them off and sported the frayed look that was once in style.   He traveled by bicycle for years...now he goes by foot...EVERYWHERE! Although, sometimes difficult to interpret what he is saying...a smile in return will usually suffice.  Today, giving Joe a ride blessed me more than him I am sure...as he hitches rides daily.  Although, I was running late, I decided to make this tiny act of kindness a priority. As Jordan expresses a sigh of relief, he joined Britton in the back seat who was playing his DS. Joe talked, laughed, and hugged on Britton nearly the whole ride to Maebob's.  Fun times and off to school we go! 

 

So today my blessings come in small packages yet huge in reality:

A new day

Rain...and a valid excuse for not running

God's word

My nuzzle partner

Coffee Fairies

My beautiful children

SCA beauties that just smile - even when it is 800...well may 805 when I drive up.

....and Joe Henry Hoover!

 

  Today my tardiness was legit...who could resist a face like this? 

 

You Never Know

Blog world, I will warn you that the following contents are useless bits of information.  But I find myself lately needing light hearted humor in this thing called, life. 

As I was rummaging through my purse this morning, I chuckled because I never could locate what I was searching for and I knew it was there...somewhere.  I was suddenly taken aback at just how many "things"  I had to pass over in my hunt.  If one was to search my bag right now they would find:

*Happy Hollow Daycare Forms I received a week ago... all I had to do was place a signature and Lindsey said she would do the rest...I'll get them to her one day 
*A jar of Earth Balance Peanut Butter (made with coconut oil), my new found love, introduced to me by my sis
*A Granny Smith apple, my daily snack that I indulge with the above contents slathered along the top
*A knitting pattern, along with yarn and needles of course
*A pair of socks- for my Drs. appt today ...yuck!
*Recipes I got from "Miss Alice" (MeMe)
*A Protein bar, another daily afternoon snack
*A Ring Pop I promised to a sweet girl
*An eraser in the shape of a game controller (still in the package)
*My grocery cash envelope... empty
*Shoestrings x2... 1 black pair and 1 white pair
*Kineseo Tex tape along with instructions (Thanks Emma!)
*A vast array of medications
*Box tops and coke tops for SCA
*Dental Floss...Julie, my good friend and dental hygienist would be proud
*Lip Stick...Jason calls this my "pop-pop"...one of my necessities

I am seen carrying this purse/bag of mine everywhere I go.  On Sundays, its usually loaded with even more items belonging to the kids and of course my morning travel mug.  I would guess that one would be surprised if they took a peep in my satchel. 

So, what's in your bag?